Alone Doesn’t Have to be Lonely

I don’t remember exactly what inspired this mixed media painting.  Except that it was another intuitive journey and continued to shift over time.  Putting down colors that I was drawn to, seeing images within the evolving piece, deciding which ones to elaborate on and which ones to let go.

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It was a cold, winter’s night in the mountains where I live.  There was the early dark of winter and a blizzard outside.  There was nowhere to go and no friend to meet.  An existential loneliness settled in around me.  Resistance is the first response when an uncomfortable feeling presents.  Feet dug in…”I don’t want to go there.”  But it persisted and I needed to be with it.  I’d been working on a painting of a polar bear in the Arctic.  I’d been trying to paint the aurora borealis.  Good luck with that!  That sky went through so many changes.

aurora

What prompted me to paint a polar bear in the Arctic, that I can’t really say except that as I created the background, his image hovered in the painting.  I brought him forward.

polarbear1

That night of extreme loneliness, staring at this painting in process, imagining the polar bear as his world disappears, I wrote the poem that I’ve already shared in this blog earlier.  It begins like this…

It’s cold and I’m alone again at night
The stars so far away, no comfort there
Is the polar bear aware of his plight?
Ice floes are melting, does anyone care?

Painting this piece, writing the poem, helped to shift my energy.  The poem and painting connected me to something outside of myself, bigger than my small life and this moment of loneliness.

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To be human is to feel loneliness at times.  In this time of the pandemic, social isolation and uncertainty, find a way to either write, draw or paint or any other creative activity.
One exploration could involve color.  Color crayons, watercolors, acrylics, colored pencils…any of these work.  On a piece of paper, put down colors that you feel particularly attracted to.  Place them side by side, at different angles to each other.  If you are using paints, notice which colors make other colors “pop” forward and which colors recede.  Let yourself play with color.

 

 

The Virus.1.

I’m not ignoring the virus, the pandemic, the constraints on travel, the isolation, the possible detrimental effects to businesses and their employees as we slow everything down, bring some things to a halt and are forced to isolate and go inside.  If we hopefully aren’t sick, chances are that we or someone we know are directly affected by the restrictions in place at this time.

One of my nieces has been at a cooking school in Southern Italy since January.  The school closed before the course was completed.  She is currently on her way home having to make three different flight connections–one in Munich, one in London and then home to San Francisco.  She is going to self-quarantine for two weeks.  We aren’t sure what requirements she is going to face at each of her stopping points.  We pray for her safe return and minimal hardship along the way.

Then, a nephew working in the entertainment industry, may lose his job.  He finds out today.  He has a wife and three young children.  I can only imagine the stress that he is under at this time.  Of course, ideally, employers should take care of their employees at such a time.  I read that Disneyland is paying their employees during the shutdown.  Yes, we each deserve to be so valued.

One of my daughters is a nurse.  She works twelve-hour shifts.  In a clinic for low income people.  She is sure she’s been exposed to the virus at this point, even with all the precautions that she takes.  On the weekend, she shops for groceries.  She is dismayed to see that the shelves are emptied by people in a panic.  When she loads her shopping cart with what she can find of her weekly food supply, someone in line smirks and says “hoarding.”  She has a husband and three children all at home due to school closures across the land.  We know so little of other people’s lives.  Another reason to be considerate.

For me, I work at home, so at this time, it’s not affecting my daily work routine.  I admit to taking one extra of things on the grocery shelf than I might ordinarily.  I leave plenty for others.  However, being single, I do miss the local social gatherings that have been cancelled.  I call a family member or a friend…but it’s not the same as being in their physical company.  Even living in a small community, the streets are bare and it is somewhat eerie.  I do have concern for my family that lives in the big city.  I do pray for everyone, for a worldly calm to descend.  I also hope that we take advantage of this time apart.

Blessings, calm and good health to you and your families.